Paying it forward

Many years ago, when my ex and I split up, I heard unexpectedly from someone I hadn't been in touch with for years. She had heard about the split, she wrote, and had been there herself. She wished me the best of luck, assured me I could get through it, and let me know she was there if I wanted to talk.

I never forgot that. It was a lifeline for me. I was 28, no one I knew of my close friends had ever been divorced, and it was extraordinarily isolating. To find someone -- just one person -- who seemed to get it was a godsend.

Today we got an email from an old friend of Dieter's that he and his girlfriend of six years had split up. I didn't know her very well, but I liked her a lot. And so I sent her an email, just wishing her well and letting her know I'd been there, that she could get through it too.

I don't know if I'll ever hear from her, and it honestly doesn't matter if I do. But having had someone reach out to me and help me up has made me realize just how important one little email can be. It might not be her that it helps, but another time maybe one little line I write will help. I certainly hope so. Someone once sent me a lifeline; I'll try and pass it along.