Solitaire

I downloaded a solitaire game for my iPhone. I remember back to the early days of my marriage, when we were in grad school and had no money -- solitaire was the only computer game we had, and there was no TV, and we'd each play it for ages. It was the mindless time sink that you kind of need to decompress. The ex would play every game; I would pick and choose and play only the games that I thought looked winnable.

I still do this.

We had an argument about it once. Maybe more of a discussion. "What are you teaching our children?" he exclaimed. "To only play if you can win? I play all games no matter what. It's always good to try."

"No," I retorted. "I'm teaching them to choose their battles. I'm teaching them it's ok to give up if they don't want to try."

Now, with the benefit of ten years and a kid behind me, I smile and think to myself -- what I would actually want to teach my child is that it's just a freaking game. It exists entirely to amuse you, and however you are amused with the game is the right way to play it. It has no more relevance to how you live life than ... I don't know, how you use a fork.

Honestly. The things you take seriously at 25.

Or, perhaps, the things I took seriously in that marriage, and an illustration of why the hell I'm better off out of it.