Sunday, July 4, 2010

Nadir

I woke up this morning feeling like hell.

I'm tired. I'm headachy. I'm not as bright as I want to be. I'm at my parents sleeping on a mattress on the floor, and my body hurts. My daughter has decided the car seat is torture, but my arms -- and mine only -- are bliss. My son is dealing with sharing his mom and doesn't ... Have the emotional reserves to deal with everyday life. He's experiencing life on full-bore: it's either GREAT and he's shrieking in delight, or it's HORRIBLE and he's sobbing. The ricochet from one to another is exhausting. And let's face it: the bloom is off the newborn rose. I'm tired of being on call 24/7. I'd like a few hours off.

And I think to myself: no, it isn't you. It's that this it it: the nadir of your life. Life with a newborn and an adjusting preschooler IS HARD. there's just no two ways about it. Of COURSE you're exhausted and overwhelmed. Of COURSE you are. Of course you feel like hell some days.

But then the key is: it's only going to get better. The Boy will adjust. Grow up, be more mature and responsible. The newborn will be ... Less new born and realize the car seat isn't so bad. I will be more rested and relaxed.

And looking farther forward, I have two great kids, a great partner and a nice career and things are just looking up. The three month mark is just around the corner and it all gets better from there.

I just have to get through the days one at a time. Just keep on keeping on. The only way out is through.

3 comments:

AvenSarah said...

You're quite right--and you can do it! One day, one hour at a time, if necessary.

wealhtheow said...

Yep -- one day at a time ...

wealhtheow said...

Or, you know, one minute :P