Must pay more attention when getting dressed in the morning

I have a job where it would be quite ok for me to wear a full suit, pearls, hose and heels to work every single day. I don't. I would never be able to stand it, let alone find each morning a pair of pantyhose with no run in them. Mostly I wear dress pants and a nice sweater -- not like a knitted wool one, something thin with tiny stitches that you don't need to wear a shirt underneath. I hate ironing, so the modest collection of dress shirts that I own almost never see the light of day. I'm the writer, I never have to see people, what is the point, anyway??

This morning, however, I decided to shake things up a little, and wore a skirt. A denim skirt, since I had no meetings and could get away with denim, and some tights. Tights are slightly better than pantyhose, they don't run as easily. Alas I look like I'm about 16 when I wear them, but ... oh well. Anyway. Tights. Denim skirt. Ballet flats and a sweater and I'm out the door. I was in a hurry this morning; I was told yesterday that I needed a particularly important letter ready for the boss' boss by 10am, and I hadn't had a chance to look at it last night, so all I had was this morning. I dropped off my kid, rushed to the office, and got straight to work (only to be told 10 minutes before 10 that the letter wasn't needed after all, of course). 

And worked, and worked, given that that's what I do, after all. 

I sit at a desk most of the day, so I didn't notice the creepage very much. Only when I got up to walk around -- visit a colleague, get lunch, go to the washroom -- did I notice that my tights were doing some definite ... creeping. I wasn't so much getting the elephant ankles as the crotch was hovering somewhere mid thigh. I lost some weight in the fall and so many of my clothes are looser, and I just shrugged and figured that the tights were ones I had bought while I was a little heavier, and that's all it was. 

Turns out yes, but a LOT heavier. 

This evening I arrived home around 7 and immediately went off into the bedroom to get rid of the DAMN TIGHTS which by then were of course driving me crazy and had a bit of a laugh when I saw that they were by then closer to my knees than where they should be ... and looked in the mirror. And paused. 

Because the front of them was lighter than the rest. Almost like there was a U-shaped ... panel ... in the front of them.

Lord, I can't even remember BUYING maternity tights, let alone wearing them (I think my enormous size at the end would have made tights an instrument of torture), but at least now I know where the HELL THEY ENDED UP. Back in the sock drawer, to torment me once again. 

Mental note to self: probably a good idea to watch what you're doing when you get dressed in the morning.