Thursday, May 13, 2010

Tips for people upon meeting a newborn baby

Don't touch the baby.

Just don't. Don't touch the baby unless invited. Don't touch the baby when you don't know the mother.

Or at least ask.

And don't, under any circumstances, touch the baby without consent, and then casually mention you're just getting over strep throat. It may cause said (tired, hormonal) mother to sob hysterically over the prospect of her less than two week old baby getting horrendously sick and being in hospital. She's (as I said) tired and hormonal, and isn't thinking that you, having HAD strep throat and HAD antibiotics are probably the least likely person that day to pass on strep to the baby; your body has been cleared of the infection. Still. You know? Just good policy to NOT TOUCH THE BABY IN THE FIRST PLACE.

(Honestly. I mean, come on, people! Do you touch other people you've just met? Do you reach out and stroke the faces of people you've just been introduced to? I just. Don't. Get. It. I do not touch people unless I know them well. I just don't. I think it's weird to invade personal space of people you aren't close to. Maybe they will welcome it, maybe they won't, but you don't know. This is the same as touching a pregnant woman's belly. Just Don't. Do. It. Not unless you know the person, and even then it's polite to ask. To a stranger? This is just. Wrong.)

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