New Year's Eve

4:30 pm. My parents, who braved the conditions of the city to visit our child and take care of him for a few hours, have just left. There's tea fixings leftover, and the sky is darkening. 

Last day of 2008, 100th post. I think there must be something significant about this, but I don't know if I want to be all reflective. I think sometimes I'm much too reflective, that I live too much in my own head. And maybe just sitting here and watching a movie with my child and being in the moment is a better use of my time than sitting and thinking about what's gone by, and even what's to come.

In the end, what's to come will be what it is. By which I mean -- there are several things I would like to happen in the next year, but I have no control over any of them. Control is a big thing for me. I like to be in control; realizing that I have none is a big step for me. The future is completely blank. What I want to happen might happen; what I fear will happen might happen (although much less likely); what's most likely to happen is a combination of what I hope for, a bunch of things I don't expect, and ... nothing. By which I mean -- the status quo, which I think is a good thing. Some amount of stability and predictability is a good thing.

Do I have a point? Probably not. I guess in the end I mean -- 2008 had some great points and some low ones. I'm kind of glad it's over. I'm looking forward to 2009 and I hope that good things will happen. I know some good things will, and probably some bad ones will too. We will weather each one as we did last year. I hope very much that 2009 will bring some good things for everyone out there. If you're reading this, that means you too. Happy New Year.